Thursday, June 28, 2012

While I ponder..

Anyone who knows me knows that one of my favourite things to do while being at this low level of health is to try and make a little extra money. I favour points sites that are easy to use, but not monotonous or time-consuming. A new Canadian company that has started strong is LikeNet. They put a twist on the typical points-delivery by directly campaigning businesses to advertise with them. The difference lies in the variety of advertising options.

Backing up a bit, as someone who simply wants to make a little cash, MY responsibility is to check in (each day ideally) and be offered points in exchange for 'liking' a company on facebook, completing a short survey (like one or two questions usually) or reading through a website in search of a cash-providing code.

If I had my own business.. or even say.. a blog (wink wink), I could decide to use my own money or even my LikeNet "points" to fund getting extra viewers to my page/blog.

For me doing things like this serve me well on a couple of levels. I feel like I'm contributing to both my own enjoyment (money for little gifts for myself on a rainy or hard day) and my families goals for the future by not limiting myself to whats available to me before I can go back to work.

I also hope that one day when I get my full life back, this time will have taught me lessons in frugality that I can condense into something usable in the busier future.

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Wednesday, June 20, 2012

30

I have had a lovely spring. My health has been constantly stable and positive for months overall and I've had the opportunity to do little things that make me feel I'm living my life still.

Most recently (frankly, I have the memory of a goldfish and can probably only go back maybe a month at best) I turned 30 surrounded by a small group of family and friends at my parents house. I had wished for a backyard barbeque, but the weatherman let me down and we were rained into the house. Still, we had chicken and sweet potato fries, a gorgeous cake specially-designed with a few of my faves (colour, flower), a wonderfully touching suprise of a professional photo of the kids in my life, my nephews and neice, all together, and countless more spoils that I couldn't possibly deserve.

My husband had two weeks off this spring as well, which always intimidates me because it means for two weeks I have to go without my couch-naps (we live in a very small place with no doors... so its difficult to find quiet and space). Lucky for me, hubby loves golf and spent a good amount of time doing exactly that, but we still managed to do a few interesting things together like travel to the U.S and niagara falls, the drive-in movies, etc.

Transplant of course drifts in and out of my head, muted but there. Ive recently had a new symptom that has plagued me a week out of each of the last two months (love being a woman.. NOT) and if I see it one more time I'm going to have to get concerned that my lungs are crying out for a change..
The worst thing about CF is how different everyone is. How unpredictable the course of it is. It never becomes acceptable.

When I came to write this new blog post, I caught a glimpse of a blog I used to read called "CFhusband". Tricia Lawrensons amazing triumphs over low lung function pregnancy, high risk transplant, and cancer have been a source of strength for me. Today, however, I found her in yet another position of fragility facing heavy-duty organ rejection. It saddened me to say the least. One of the big issues especially with people like myself who struggle to make the leap to listing for transplant, is whether or not its wise to subject myself to negative stories and outcomes. I've always been of the mindset that there is no sense fooling yourself about anything, and the best kind of positive attitude comes from a realistic place. That said, I no longer read CF blogs and search for new ones and topics I wonder about. I follow my select few friends blogs to support them, but I know whats going on with them anyways. I feel I have closed the door on my phase of exploration, for the best.

Everything has a reason I believe, and maybe theres something in the Lawrensons' next chapter that I should see.. because I am back reading and praying for them now.