Favourite Lesson of Life So Far

Calm. Relax. Seems pretty cliche... seems easy even. I remember elementary gym classes and recreational gymnastics with warmups and cool downs involving "think about every muscle in turn and relax it. Let it get loose. Ok, first ankles.. 2...3...4... now knees...2..3 ". I always thought it was such bogus. Now, its my entire lifeline and philosophy. I can't even quite be sure of the source.

Approaching 30 seems feasible. My mom always said that the 30's were her favourite because its when things started feeling in place.. you feel really adult.. like for real this time (unlike when you were 16, and then again at 25) and you just know who you are. I definetly think thats playing its part, but moreso its my CF and its progression.

It's effect is many-fold (real word? This 29 and 11/12ths year old doesn't care). The first I learned when I fainted from coughing in 2007. Apparently coughs that go hack-hack-hack-hack-hack-hack-hack-hack-hack-hack-hack-hack (etc) without a breath deprive your brain of oxygen. Who knew? So since then I cough "carefully". After about 6 hacks, I do everything I can to suck in a breath before continuing. Much harder than it sounds but I can proudly say that I haven't fainted since. That's #1.

Then theres physio. I've struggled with physio. From not doing it forever, to finally getting tough and doing it daily.. I find myself finding excuses why I "can't do the flutter tonight, ill stick to the easier percussion..." or... "one physio is enough today.. I dont have a book to read while doing it". Needless to say, at the very least I thought I should get more quality in, if quantity is always going to be an issue. One thing I realized FINALLY in the last yearish.. is that as someone with a chronic cough, I pretty much tense my lungs, butt (tmi..sorry), bladder, stomach... all the time. Preventing coughs, or just making sure only one orafice leaks (tmi x 2) is high on my subconscious priority list. So. One of the things I've started doing is trying to relax all my muscles once in awhile. And, during physio, or when I just know i "need to cough".. I go to the bathroom. I sit on the toilet or in the shower.. and I feel much more able to take bigger, slower breaths, and cough more effectively. I'm even getting better at coughing slower, deeper, better (get more air behind the phlegm I once heard and stuck with me) without being in the bathroom ;) .

Finally, with the anxiety that has become an unwelcome constant in my life, I embrace calm in every form. I try to not be quick to snap (never gonna perfect this--I AM a girl afterall) and take things with a grain of salt. I'm lucky because I've always been about a 3 on the high-strung scale. Ironically my biggest anxiety/stress/clench my muscles trigger is other people acting stressed out. More and more this gets to me. I find myself either flipping out and losing my control of my fragile lungs and oxygen supply, or trying to problem solve their problems quickly. One of my fave CF'ers had this way of being the calm, funny one virtually all the time. I aspire to take that with me, and as I get sicker I understand the need for that approach more.

Lastly, anything that can't be turned into calm, should be turned into motivation. Don't sweat the small stuff, and to risk copyrighting JR... Take those lemons and make a lemontini.